It’s been a while since I have last blogged and a lot of that comes from my excuse of being “too busy”. Truthfully, I wasn’t sure what I felt God putting on my heart to write and share. Recently though, its been a reoccurring theme that I felt I needed to share with those reading, so that’s what this blog is about.
It’s about control, and it’s about identity, and how those two seem to correlate recently for me.
Control
Recently I had to speak at Young Life, it went well for the most part but the days and honestly since then (2 weeks ago) I haven’t been able to let go of the idea: control. You see I was supposed to speak on “Man’s Struggle With Control”. Praise the Lord, something that will challenge me and call me out! I struggle with it in every aspect of my life whether that be academically, faith, relationships, and even baseball. I WANT control of the things in my life because I THINK I know what is best for me, I think I know what will turn out to be beneficial for me. This is where God has the Jeopardy buzzer to tell me I’m dead wrong. I don’t have a clue!
Identity
Many of you are familiar with the death of Kiefer Holman and what all has taken place in the last week. Kiefer wasn’t one of my close friends, in fact, if you look at it from the world’s standards, we weren’t even Facebook official. But his death has really challenged me. I’ve talked to a lot of people who have shared stories and memories of Kiefer and I have watched and read the reports since the day he went missing. There’s an underlying message in every story, memory, or report that I have heard, I don’t know if you caught it….. Kiefer Cody Holman’s identity wasn’t a college student, it wasn’t a boyfriend, it wasn’t a son, friend, grandson, soccer player.
You may be thinking, actually that’s exactly the things that he was and was reported, you’re right. But above all of those title’s, in every story, memory, and report, Kiefer Holman was a man of God. His identity was based around him being a Christian, and that spread into the other areas of his life. What a legacy to leave behind, being known for being on fire for Christ and having Him at the center of every area of your life.
Control + Identity
What a concept that would be, to give up control, turn EVERYTHING in your life over to God and see what could happen. Here’s my prediction (if I’m allowed to make a prediction about that….?):
My life wouldn’t be filled with stress, anxiety, struggle, frustration. I would know and take rest in knowing that my life is in the hands of someone greater who knows what is best for me and wants what is best for me. If I would just wake up every day and die to His control, to trust. My identity wouldn’t be Austin the baseball player, the college student, the Young Life leader, the _________. You fill in the blank. My identity may be close to what the lasting impression Kiefer Holman left on so many of us, a man of God who wanted nothing more than to glorify his maker and to be so filled with Him that it overflowed into the lives of the people around him, even the people he was in contact with for short periods of time. So the challenge: let go, give up control in every aspect of life to Him, trust, and watch the transformation.
Kiefer, you will be missed by more than I know, but the challenge you have brought to my life, will never be forgotten, and always evident. Thank you. Save me a seat in heaven
