I recently got the opportunity to take a group of high school students from Abilene, TX to summer camp through my involvement in Young Life. Some of you will know and recognize Young Life some of you may not. Young Life is a relationship based (Christian non-denominational) ministry that is not directly connected to a specific church. What my role is, as a volunteer leader, is to spend time with high school students, getting to know them, watching them in activities and events, and just hanging out with them when I can (and when they have nothing better to do). As time develops the hope is to have conversations about Jesus Christ and present an opportunity to talk about the things they want to know, struggle with, desire, or question.
This is something I have been doing for a long time; my parents were Young Life leaders and committee members from the day I was born until about the age of 12 or 13. I then became a Wylde Life Leader (Mid-School students) leader as a high school student for almost 3 years. Going to college I became a Young Life leader and started the journey of getting to know students at one specific high school within the area. Ask anyone that does Young Life and they will tell you that it is not easy, but it’s worth it.
While we were at camp, each night after listening to the camp speaker, David Page, we returned to our cabin to have “cabin time”. This is a time to reflect and discuss things we heard and what it meant to us each individually. Cabin time is where I get to get my hands dirty and present insight (or lack there of) on topics we are discussing, these can range from sex to murder or sin to salvation. This one specific night I was having a hard time talking to my guys in my cabin as I looked around the room at a group of high school students from Abilene, TX, the Bible Belt and saw this inward empty feeling. The looks on their faces and their body language hit me as tears filled my eyes; they get it, but there’s more than simply getting it, it has to become real and apparent. I shared with the group of 6 guys with me that I loved them, truly loved them, not this word that we throw around in culture for things we enjoy, but truly loved them and cared deeply for them.
We left cabin time that night to go enjoy a concert by Ryan Long, the musical guest that week at camp, go look up his music, he is incredibly talented. As I stood there at the back of the room while Ryan sang a song with the lyrics “I’m not waving I’m drowning, do you care about me? I’m starting to doubt whether I will be anything” the only thing that I could think about were the dudes in my cabin, is this what they felt. I started to wonder how many of us in that cabin felt that way, I could see the hurt, anger, fear, sadness on their faces. I had to excuse myself from the room and walk outside because tears were flowing from my eyes as I got a glimpse of what I think the Father sees when He looks down on us.
My heart broke, for the first time in my life, for someone’s salvation. My heart broke for the fear of someone not understanding and living that understanding. I was crushed, in every way imaginable, I was broken over this.
I said that I believe I caught a glimpse of what the Father sees when He looks down on our world, on our nation, on our community, on us. He sees us, He sees me, and I understand, I get it, I know what is right and that it’s the only way, but does my life, my actions, my behaviors, my thoughts, and my motives echo that in my actions, in my living? I wish I could say that 100% of the time yes, but that would be a lie, because I have fallen short, we all have. Do I say this to discourage us, no; I say this because I realize that salvation isn’t something passive or to be tempted or messed around with, it’s a serious matter. David Page said during a meeting we had, he said “don’t just exist, live” That opens up a new topic but I will leave with this, we can all exist, that’s easy, challenge yourselves to live. Challenge yourself to not just understand but put that into work in every area. Don’t let heartbreak from the Father happen over you. I’ve caught only a glimpse, a small scale vision of what that is like, and it isn’t a great feeling. Always here to chat more, thanks for reading
Much Love
Austin
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